Our blogs this month focus on getting back to the basics during the often chaotic and stressful holiday season.

As a behavioral health therapist, I often hear my patients say that the holidays just don’t seem to be what they “should.”  Instead of instant holiday bliss as shown in magical holiday movies, people often report feeling frustrated, disappointed, and unfulfilled.  How does this happen?  And what can we do to live well… even during the holidays?

It seems that the first step is letting go of the romanticized idea that just because it is the holiday season, all will be right with the world.  If one is struggling emotionally before the holiday season, it is unlikely to disappear because November or December rolls around.  This seems like a silly, simple idea, but I think it has some merit.  Instead of pressuring ourselves into a forced happiness, let us give ourselves some grace in understanding that the holidays can be difficult.

Remembering the loss of loved ones, strained family relationships, and financial stress can all contribute to lack of yuletide bliss.  Give yourself permission to be human– that is, to feel and grieve if you need to.  It seems that we often convince ourselves that we have to be robotic elves with painted smiles during the holidays.  What a tall order to live up to!

One the other hand, let’s not forget the power of genuine gratitude and positive thinking.  Though it is important to acknowledge our humanness and let ourselves feel, it’s also important to be intentional about focusing our thoughts on those things in our lives for which we are authentically thankful.  Finding those nuggets in our lives that are positive in the midst of frustration and darkness can change how we think about ourselves and the world and, in turn, influence our emotional experience.  In fact, studies have shown that those who exercise regular, intentional expressions of gratitude report higher levels of happiness, have fewer health complaints, exercise more, sleep better, express more goodwill toward others, and even have better marriages!

How do you make this happen?  Try a daily gratitude journal.  Each morning when you wake or each night before you go to bed, write down three things in your life that you are truly thankful for.  Also, be intentional each day about expressing to others what you appreciate about them as well as telling yourself one thing you’ve done well or a positive quality about yourself.

My hope is that we are all able let ourselves be human during the holidays and recognize the wonderful things in our lives for which we are genuinely grateful.

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What’s ONE thing you’re thankful for this holiday season? Tell us!

The statement above may not be new to anyone, but it is a good reminder of how critical a role that a primary caregiver has with a small child.  Now, think about if you ARE the primary caregiver, but you are a single parent or a couple that is underemployed and not making much money or a parent who has been laid off while yourself or your spouse was pregnant.  Think about the stress that was already present because of the pregnancy, and now think about MUCH  MORE stress is present because of job loss or lack of money available.

In a study done by the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System (NCANDS), 43.6 children per 1000 children received preventative services.  Preventative services are aimed at increasing the understanding of child development for the primary caregiver. This number has dropped since 2007, and the victimization rate in 2008 was the lowest it had been since 2003.  At first thought, it may seem alright that preventative services are declining; however, prevention is the key to the success of a lower victimization rate!

Help HealthNet’s Better Indy Babies and Healthy Families programs continue to keep preventative services steady for at-risk families.  You can help ease the stress of a caregiver by simply spreading awareness about the need for prevention or by donating a quick $25 to HealthNet.

You knew your baby would cry. But, did you know how frustrating that crying would be when you tried everything to comfort your baby, and she just kept crying?

Dealing with a crying baby can be very hard, and parents often don’t realize just how frustrating it is until they are in that situation. No one thinks they will shake their infant, but research shows that crying is the number one trigger leading caregivers to violently shake and injure babies.

Poverty can also be a contributing factor to shaken-baby syndrome. The stressful effects of a faltering economy, skyrocketing unemployment and precarious personal finances can be dire. People take up smoking or use alcohol to cope, they become depressed or suicidal, and they develop stress-related illnesses like heart disease. Now researchers report that the harm may be spreading to children too.

The fact is that crying—including long bouts of inconsolable crying—is normal developmental behavior in infants. The problem is not the crying, it’s how caregivers respond to it.

The “Happiest Baby on the Block” program teaches parents the mystery of colic with the discovery of a calming reflex – the incredible “off-switch” for infant crying and on switch for baby sleep that can soothe most fussy babies in minutes and add 1-3 hours to a baby’s sleep.

HealthNet Health Promotions’ certified teachers offer free classes in these techniques for low-income parents living in Indianapolis.  If you’d like to support a new mom with a “Happiest Baby” gift basket including a swaddling blanket, soothing sounds CD and helpful tips, please  consider making a donation to HealthNet Health Promotions today!